On September 30th, far-right white nationalist muppets will be holding a rally in Peterborough. The Kermit of the group, Little Kev, sports a swastika chest tattoo and has previously held white-pride rallies in Peterborough Square. In response to this dim spectacle, the brightest Peterborites are naturally proposing counter rallies and protests.

French thinker Michel Foucault warned that if you are going to resist, make sure to break the narrative. Resisting the power you hated often empowered and reinforced the rhetoric of those that you are against, contrary to your intentions. Resistance handicaps itself by playing into the opposing power relations, becoming part of the discourse and only continuing the conversation you think is dumb.

If we stop being pretentious idiots for a moment, the point is simple: we need to take their power away from them, and the best way to do this is make them look ridiculous.

Not to preach some form of hippie sentiment (which always reeks of Patchouli and pine), but we  don’t think an intellectually aggressive counter will work with these people. Most debates between the far-right, and the conscious left end in some form of aggression, which drains the energy, and strains the voices of those that could be used in more productive, and less consuming ways.

Orthodox protests are excellent ways of demonstrating solidarity with oppressed groups and victims, but are not always the most effective way of challenging oppressors. They continue the conversations you want to stop and when confronting the opposing group, fail to take any power away: which is the ultimate goal.

For this reason, we support the efforts of counter-protesters, but also advocate for making the muppets’ rally ridiculous, efforts inconsequential, and ideologies irrelevant. With Ol’ Foucault’s warnings in mind, we have come up with a few alternative ways to protest the Canadian… We aren’t going to say their actual name, so let’s just call them Moon People.

Here’s how to make the muppets look as stupid as possible, without the typical picketing and yelling associated with counter-protesting.

 

  1. Multicultural potluck hosted in Peterborough Square during the protest itself. White nationalists need to eat too!

 

  1. Show up in fetish gear. It will help the nationalists fit in, as their shitty, abhorrent, stupid views are really just a self-induced form of sadomasochism.

 

  1. Overpower them with college pride. O-Week leaders are loud. Get as many of them as possible to lead cheers. Maybe the ignorant bastards will have a change of heart and join in. The Champlain rollercoaster is really fun, let’s find out if they want MOOOOORE SALSAAA!

 

  1. Loads of people turn up steadily but on their own, standing amongst the muppets, scrolling on their phones or just generally looking bored. If any of them ask what you’re doing, you say “I’m just waiting for a mate.”

 

  1. Hold your own protest. Not a counter-rally: a protest. They are being complete idiots, so out-idiot them. Come up with a particularly stupid idea to protest, then turn up and paint the white pride muppets as counter protesters to you. Thinking of staging a protest against tyrannical mature cheddar? Well then they become wild pro mature cheddar advocates.

Just an idea.